Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Chronicles of my life with a blonde: part 16, How many blondes needed to use an easy bake oven?

Q: How many blondes needed to use an Easy Bake Oven™?

A: 2...and a Brunette to walk them through it. *sigh* Thus begins another chronicle of my life with a blonde, putting the "irony" in "easy."

little Blonde Spouse Mini Me (aka Ana Rasa) to Brunette Self, "Momma, I wanna play with my Easy Bake Oven™."

Brunette Self to little Blonde Spouse Mini Me (aka Ana Rasa), "Honey, how about you ask Daddy to play with you with your Easy Bake Oven™? The two of you haven't played with it together yet!" [inside Brunette Self is thinking Brunette Brother and Brunette Momma have been suckered into playing with Easy Bake Oven™ on a twice rotation, when it is Blonde Spousus Santa Claus who purchased said Easy Bake Oven™ for ages 8 and up for said little Blonde Spouse Mini Me age 5...ha...revenge is mine! BWAHHAAHAA!]

little Blonde Spouse Mini Me replies, "What a great idea!"

Fast forward two days to unsuspecting Blonde Spousus Santa Claus' next day off.

little Blonde Spouse Mini Me approaches said Blonde Spousus Santa Claus, "Daddy, will you please play with me and play Easy Bake Oven™?"

Blonde Spousus Santa Claus, 'fast stepping' replies, "Perhaps another time."

little Blonde Spouse Mini Me tears up. Big mean Brunette Self jumps in and reminds Blonde Spousus Santa Claus that Brunette Brother and Brunette Momma have already played twice with little Blonde Spouse Mini Me and that it's Blonde Spousus [Santa Claus]' turn. Realizing he's been bamboozled, he laughingly agrees.

But alas, revenge was HIS [plot twist]. It began with a frustrating 15 minutes while he struggled with the picture instructions. Brunette Self begins to feel incredibly guilty.

Blonde Spousus Santa Claus then starts poking things into Easy Bake Oven™ trying to "figure out how to get the **&^*&#^$%#@* cake pan IN there! There's no door!"

Brunette Self realizes impending shock hazard and spends the next 15 minutes guiding Blonde Spousus Santa Claus and little Blonde Spouse Mini Me like Wolfgang Puck through the process of preparing the batter, pans and how to slide the cake pan through the oven without ripping it apart.

By end of process, Blonde Spouse Santa Claus and little Blonde Spouse Mini Me have retired from the kitchen, leaving Brunette Self to complete the cake. DAMN. :D

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